Kinds of 90's Parents

90'S Parents - This topic is very close to my heart. In this, it's not the voice of my thoughts, it's my heart which speaks out loud. Parents and Friends are two important things that make my heart to skip a beat. There will always be a cold war between these two teams in every discussion. But the irony is, both are fighting for the same thing - and it's ME. Both of them wants me to be happy and happy all the time. 

 

So, what's the problem, dude?? You have an issue to have people around who want you to be happy?? Are you mad??. I know what you are thinking. I can hear your mind voice aloud. Don't judge me too fast, guys. There is no problem here at all. Just that their definition of HAPPY differ from each other. That's all.

 

I think I was like 15 that time. I read a quote on a book - " You will be the luckiest when your friends become family and family become friends". So nice right!!. Even I thought the same. The first part is good and little easy if you get a good set of friends/ friend. But, later one - is not that advisable for health :-). Just Kidding. I have come across a few lucky fellows, who achieved this and I always envy them for my whole life. Otherwise, in most cases, it's quite risky I can say.

 

We have heard a lot about us ( Gen Y and Gen Z kids ), being categorized into different groups by all parents like – Super good, Good, Average and so on, based on different factors and it is always relative with other kids. But, here I am gonna categorize our Parents based on the ways of love showered on children. Every parent strives hard to give their kid a good and healthier life. But, the path they choose makes the difference.

 

off the bat, here comes the disclaimer - All the characters and events depicted are fictitious. Any resemblance to a person living or dead is purely coincidental. And please no offence, I am not criticizing parents love here. Its incredible and nothing will match to that. I am just trying to convey something in a comic way, which we all have it inside us.

 

 

Materialistic Parents – These are the kind of parents where they show love by giving things – bike, books, food and whatever you can think of. You name it, they will get it. But never ever express their feelings through feelings. They use materials as a medium to express love. If the kid understands this form of love, no issues. But, the problem arises when the child seeks for little more than that, in a different form (Love). Other side, parents will be in an illusion, that they provide everything that child needs and will be happy always. But the actual purpose is not served. This is a never-ending story in most of individuals life

Navie Parents – These are like so Pavam Parents. For them, their Child is their world. Nothing else matters. They blindly believe the kid and no questions asked. If the Kid is from the good or Super good category, the story ends happily. But if the kid smart and cunning, there comes the twist and you can imagine the end.

 

Stony Parents – These we can say Military Parents – like very strict- no space for feelings and sympathy. They would like to have everything under control, even your own life. They hit you hard to mend you sharp. If you are strong and in line with their plan, you turn into a knife. But, if you try to fool around with their plan, you end up with bents and holes. In case, if you take a step ahead and fight back, you have a chance of getting rewarded with your life for your bravery.

 

Buddy Parents – These are like WOW parents - like every kid dream parents. They know you better than YOU. They understand all your feeling even if you forget to express to them. They support you even if you go wrong. But the beauty is, they teach you a lesson along the way. They standby your decision and walks with you when the rest of the world abandons you. They can see through you and brings out the hidden talents in you.   

Defending / Over Protective Parents - For these parents, the defensive mode is always ON. According to them, their Kid is always correct, whatever he does. Even if the kid has done something wrong, no problem, an instant protective cover will come in rescue. They will make the whole world look wrong to prove their kid right. As Parents, they will pass in distinction if they protect their child from a problem, but fail to be a human if they didn't teach him/her what is right and what is wrong.

Even, Buddy Parents also standby their kid in all odds, but there is a thin line difference. Like this -

O My God, I have done blunder. If my parents know this, I am done. God save me!!!

O My God, I have done blunder. I should call my parents to help me out!!!

O My God, I have done blunder. So what!! I have my parents to cover me!!!

The last one is the most dangerous, which is a threat to society as well as for the individual. So its good to keep a check on Protective and Overprotective meter. Too much of good thing always backfires. 

 

Community Parents: For this kind, Society always rank first. Society decides everything, like everything you can think of. Where to study, When to marry, What haircut should you have, why should you live, like everything. Your opinion doesn’t even considered. Just follow the crowd. Want to try out something new? Don’t even dare, I am telling you!! If you raise your Voice, your upbringing is questioned which will trigger your parents ultimately. This category parent carries an imaginary box of 'Prestige and Status' and tries to build their child career on that. So, how to deal with this? May this Society itself shall teach us what to do. Let’s hope. Fingers Crossed!!


These are some kinds which I observed in my surroundings and heard from the Kids itself. We also encounter hybrid kind at times like - Stony and Community - Defending and Materialistic - Navie and Buddy.- As you can see now, the first one is a little too much to handle. 

There is scientific reasoning for these behaviours of our Parents. It is not what they are born with.  After all, our parents are also kids like us. Their parenting style is majorly influenced by the parenting they experienced/received from our grandparents. Some are the effects - they want to give their child what they missed during their childhood. Some are consequences - they are convinced and decides to follow the same style to their kids.

Parenting has evolved drastically over the years - from 'Parenting is a responsibility' to 'Parenting is an art'. Yes, parenting is an art. It requires focus. It requires continuous efforts to excel at it. Even then you fail at times, but still, there will be room for improvement. 

Those days were different. If good food and shelter are provided with minimum love and support now and then, the job of parents is done. Rest is taken care because kids are dependent on Parents for these basic necessities and have minimum access to the world. So, they followed the instructions and to be frank they have done pretty good well in life -(in most of the cases. I am not including outliers here). But now, the game has changed. Rules are not the same. Players are becoming smart day by day. Due to uninterrupted access to the world, millennials are becoming self-independent and no more dependent on parents for basics. But what is not ready-made and lacking in the market is - Love, Support, Understanding, Compassion.  So, Parents responsibility is to become smart and be a step ahead to understand the child, than mere following the rule book. This helps the child to get connected with Parents and achieve his/her goals with the least mental strain. 

I am not even an amateur to talk about Parenting. I never know how is it like to be a parent and I may be wrong in a few things. These are the views and thoughts from a Child perceptive. 

Let me come back to this with Parent point of view once I reach there (It's a long way though) and see if any further editing is required. ;-)